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:iconallofmyconfusion: More from allofmyconfusion


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A word can paint a picture by ArandomMoon

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Submitted on
December 10, 2012
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I was born twice.
Once in a McDonalds’ hospital
with Mickey Mouse sheets;
my first gasp of Aunt Mary’s smoke,
my last of formaldehyde.
Laid upon today’s paper,
I was outlined by the headline
like a halo: “Diana Dead.”

Grace is my mother,
but she’s never stepped
foot in a church.
She wore hot pink to my birth
and hot pink to my funeral too.
I was named Heaven in her womb.
She didn’t care for me much
after that.

I died once
sometime after high school
but before I made anything of myself.
I cried every time I flipped on the TV.
I caught myself with sharp things
like it was Valium. Popping pills
on the side of my leg. They rolled
in circular shapes on flat surfaces.
Diagnosis was a standardized test
that only the strange didn’t pass;
I didn’t pass. I didn’t live either.

I died only once
in the bathroom of a Panera.

If you don’t know what that is,
it’s a pastry place or something.
It was the first ordinary store
I saw with a bathroom after fleeing
my “partial hospitalization” shit.

And by fleeing, I mean
walking across the street,
while using the crosswalk,
because I’m not as badass
as I imagine myself to be.

I looked down at myself
after locking the bathroom door,
“Fuck...” I was wearing a hot
pink hoodie.
Might as well be.

I was born twice,
once like a normal kid
squeezed out quick before the
commercials were over.

Second time in a tiny flower bunk bed
with a towering penguin pillow;
my first gasp of Versus Versace.
My eyes were adjusting to the light
like alien eyes, if they have eyes.
They were crusty at the corners
and watery from years of misuse.

The native of this world,
her face like the photograph
that I had seen before,
and hid so no one else could see,
probably in Harry Potter 4
because it was the biggest book
I owned. And I liked Harry Potter
most, and I liked her face most.

She kissed me because
I asked her to and because
there was nothing else that felt
right to do in the whole fucking
universe except kissing her
then and there.  

The second time I was born
I looked up at her,
and decided not to die a second time.
soooo loooonnnngggggg merrr
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Daily Deviation

Given 2013-02-25
Rebirth by ~allofmyconfusion ( Suggested by UnspecifiedUnknown and Featured by Beccalicious )
:iconblackfyrevalyrian:
BlackfyreValyrian Featured By Owner Feb 28, 2013
Okay so I totally admit I never read the writing pieces that get DD'd. I just usually don't have time to read them. But for some reason the title really caught my eye and I'm so glad I read this because this is fantastically written and so absolutely honest about real life that it's refreshing. It is also quite inspiring.
You definitely deserve this DD. Congratulations <33
Reply
:iconallofmyconfusion:
allofmyconfusion Featured By Owner Mar 6, 2013   Writer
Aw you are so sweet! I never look at the writing either :P And I'm a writer haha
Reply
:iconegoslayer:
EgoSlayer Featured By Owner Feb 26, 2013
The last two stanzas are kind of amazing... Love the whole thing...
Reply
:iconallofmyconfusion:
allofmyconfusion Featured By Owner Mar 6, 2013   Writer
Thanks! :D
Reply
:iconcranehardcore:
craneHARDCORE Featured By Owner Feb 26, 2013   General Artist
This is absolutely incredible. Beautiful work!
Reply
:iconallofmyconfusion:
allofmyconfusion Featured By Owner Mar 6, 2013   Writer
:hug:
Reply
:iconcranehardcore:
craneHARDCORE Featured By Owner Mar 6, 2013   General Artist
:heart:
Reply
:icon13devilgirl13:
13devilgirl13 Featured By Owner Feb 25, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
Awesome!!!
Reply
:iconallofmyconfusion:
allofmyconfusion Featured By Owner Mar 6, 2013   Writer
thanks!
Reply
:icon13devilgirl13:
13devilgirl13 Featured By Owner Mar 8, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
Your welcome! :)
Reply
:iconpikaninjachu:
Pikaninjachu Featured By Owner Feb 25, 2013
Its somewhat confusing but good :)
Reply
:iconallofmyconfusion:
allofmyconfusion Featured By Owner Mar 6, 2013   Writer
I get that a lot :) thank for for reading!
Reply
:iconusopplover4ever:
UsoppLover4EVER Featured By Owner Feb 25, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
THis is incredible...YOU are incredible for writing this!
:iconimpressedplz:
Reply
:iconallofmyconfusion:
allofmyconfusion Featured By Owner Mar 6, 2013   Writer
Oh my God, Thank YOU! you are too sweet :)
Reply
:iconusopplover4ever:
UsoppLover4EVER Featured By Owner Mar 7, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
:iconbrohugplz:
Reply
:icontheexplosivesushi:
TheExplosiveSushi Featured By Owner Feb 25, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
Beautiful. Stunning....amazing.
Reply
:iconallofmyconfusion:
allofmyconfusion Featured By Owner Mar 6, 2013   Writer
thanks lovely
Reply
:iconriseandbe:
RiseandBe Featured By Owner Feb 25, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
Congratulations on the DD! You absolutely deserve it!!
Reply
:iconallofmyconfusion:
allofmyconfusion Featured By Owner Mar 6, 2013   Writer
Thanks! I'm so excited! It's my first DD :)
Reply
:iconriseandbe:
RiseandBe Featured By Owner Mar 6, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
You're welcome! =D That is exciting!
Reply
:iconmydistrust:
Mydistrust Featured By Owner Feb 25, 2013
Beautiful disaster :)
Reply
:iconallofmyconfusion:
allofmyconfusion Featured By Owner Mar 6, 2013   Writer
Perfectly summed up :)
Reply
:icongnomesandunicorns:
gnomesandunicorns Featured By Owner Feb 25, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
kinda confusing, but somehow because of it it makes sense!
Reply
:iconallofmyconfusion:
allofmyconfusion Featured By Owner Mar 6, 2013   Writer
hehe the confusion leaves it up to the reader a little, I like to think.
Reply
:iconanimesilverfox:
animesilverfox Featured By Owner Feb 25, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
This. is just so beautiful. like oh my gosh. Please. get a book published or something so can buy a copy and put it on my bedside table to re-read over again o:
Reply
:iconallofmyconfusion:
allofmyconfusion Featured By Owner Mar 6, 2013   Writer
I wish!!! Oh that would be incredible! One day :) look for me: Erin Auvinen ;) when I'm a famous poet.
Reply
:iconanimesilverfox:
animesilverfox Featured By Owner Mar 7, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
I WILL :DDDD x3
Reply
:iconhoshizorakumo:
HoshizoraKumo Featured By Owner Feb 25, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
I know this feeling...
Reply
:iconallofmyconfusion:
allofmyconfusion Featured By Owner Mar 6, 2013   Writer
that's the best part of poetry, relating. :) thank you for reading
Reply
:iconsebbydecker612:
SebbyDecker612 Featured By Owner Feb 25, 2013
Amazing.
Reply
:iconallofmyconfusion:
allofmyconfusion Featured By Owner Mar 6, 2013   Writer
:hug:
Reply
:iconsebbydecker612:
SebbyDecker612 Featured By Owner Mar 6, 2013
Hugs!
Reply
:iconmorzanselvendaughter:
It's long, but good. Very deep. Kinda confusing, but that just makes you want to read it again so as to understand. XD
Reply
:iconallofmyconfusion:
allofmyconfusion Featured By Owner Mar 6, 2013   Writer
Good! I'm glad it is enticing :)
Reply
:iconmorzanselvendaughter:
MorzansElvenDaughter Featured By Owner Mar 6, 2013
I'm glad you posted this. :)
Reply
:iconkagamine-len-0202:
Kagamine-Len-0202 Featured By Owner Feb 25, 2013  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
EITHER DO A SECOND ONE OR PUBLISH THIS :D
Reply
:iconallofmyconfusion:
allofmyconfusion Featured By Owner Mar 6, 2013   Writer
I want to publish my writing so badly! I don't know how :P
Reply
:iconkagamine-len-0202:
Kagamine-Len-0202 Featured By Owner Mar 6, 2013  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
Send it to a publisher! I bet you can find one online. :33
Reply
:iconkagomekisaragi7:
KagomeKisaragi7 Featured By Owner Feb 25, 2013  Hobbyist Digital Artist
I'm in awe. You used simple words to provoke deep emotions. The way you wrote this is unbelievable.....
Reply
:iconallofmyconfusion:
allofmyconfusion Featured By Owner Mar 6, 2013   Writer
Aw thank you lovely :)
Reply
:iconmissstar489:
MissStar489 Featured By Owner Feb 25, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
Wow, just, wow.
Reply
:iconallofmyconfusion:
allofmyconfusion Featured By Owner Mar 6, 2013   Writer
:hug:
Reply
:iconerebhe:
Erebhe Featured By Owner Feb 25, 2013
I know you've read this comment like a million times, but I love this. A lot. And now understanding the meaning of it (via scrolling thru comments) just makes it so much better. Though it's dark, depressing and not cheery at all, it gives me a smile knowing people are still doing this sort of thing, like poetry and literary crap no one seems to understand. Thanks for a great read, and by the way, superb name.
Reply
:iconallofmyconfusion:
allofmyconfusion Featured By Owner Mar 6, 2013   Writer
:) :) I love that people don't fully understand it. Because I don't expect anyone to. That's one of my favorite things about poetry, it means something completely different to me than the next person and the next :) everyone finds a little of themselves in someone's story.
Reply
:icongoddessgunwolf:
GoddessGunwolf Featured By Owner Feb 25, 2013  Hobbyist Filmographer
The way this is written, wow, amazing and so well described :)
Reply
:iconallofmyconfusion:
allofmyconfusion Featured By Owner Mar 6, 2013   Writer
Thanks for reading!
Reply
:icongoddessgunwolf:
GoddessGunwolf Featured By Owner Mar 7, 2013  Hobbyist Filmographer
You are welcome :)
Reply
:iconsydpiggy1:
sydpiggy1 Featured By Owner Feb 25, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
There....are no words....it's amazing! :)

I like how you used common places, like everyday readtraunts and stores, instead of made up names.
Reply
:iconallofmyconfusion:
allofmyconfusion Featured By Owner Mar 6, 2013   Writer
thanks!
Reply
:iconwolf-blossom:
Wolf-Blossom Featured By Owner Feb 25, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
Wow.
'nuff said

*is in awe*
Reply
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